I'm a terrific listener, probably because I was partially deaf until I was 3.

Somehow, my parents didn't notice. California parents take chill to a whole new level.

But once they realized I never spoke to anyone, we got my ears fixed. So now I hear better than 99% of people.

Case in point: I can hear my neighbor pushing buttons on his microwave from my apartment right now. Terrible insulation or superpowers? Talk to me and find out.